Oprah Once Decided against Marrying Her 'Too Handsome' Partner Inside Their 3 Decade-Long Relati

Publish date: 2024-04-21

Oprah Winfrey is a phenomenal woman who holds many titles, including show host, producer, philanthropist, author, and entrepreneur. Winfrey has a glowing professional life and a colorful private life that she loves to keep private.

Winfrey's partner is Stedman Graham. The couple share an enduring and committed love, choosing a life together without the formality of marriage. Their partnership encompasses mutual respect and a shared journey through life.

Stedman Graham and Oprah Winfrey attend a gala at Bacara Resort in Goleta, California on December 6, 2014. | Source: Getty Images

The show host had never made a big deal about Valentine's Day. During her participation in the Miss Black America Pageant, Winfrey received nothing from her then-boyfriend, Bubba, while other contestants received flowers and gifts from their partners.

Feeling disappointed about receiving nothing, Winfrey expressed her frustration to a fellow contestant, who wisely replied, "Girl, if your man has put a flower on your mind, you won't need no flowers in a vase." Over a decade later, in 1986, Winfrey began noticing a certain man in town. However, since he was consistently seen with the same girlfriend, she initially didn't pay much attention to him.

Stedman Graham and Oprah Winfrey attend "The Butler" New York Premiere at Ziegfeld Theater in New York City on August 5, 2013. | Source: Getty Images

The producer and this man eventually met when they were both visiting a sick friend who later died of AIDS. Graham had come to the home alone, and so had Winfrey. Winfrey and Graham left together, and she asked him if he wanted to get a beer. He replied that he doesn't drink and, to date, he hasn't taken even one sip of anything alcoholic.

The 69-year-old found Graham to be nice, but she wasn't impressed by him. "He was polite, yes, and kind. The sort of guy who sits with an ailing friend. Tall and handsome, for sure. But actually too handsome, I thought, to be interested in me," she explained. Winfrey confessed that she thought Graham was a player, to which her producers agreed and warned her not to be involved with him.

The show host was cautious with Graham from then on. Even as friends, she wasn't as free as she wanted. She began giving him serious thoughts months later when she learned that he had broken up with his girlfriend and was asking about her dating status. The two eventually got together and have been a couple for over 30 years.

Winfrey is smitten with Graham, whom she says is so positive. She gushed that any person who has met him is amazed by what a gentleman he is. "Wants the best for me and everyone he knows. Truly wishes people well. Doesn't curse," she added. Graham also doesn't gossip or say anything negative about anyone.

The producer feels like Graham earned his first name as he is steady as a mountain. Her partner is also patient, trustworthy, accountable, and even-tempered. Over the years, as the couple dated, tabloids speculated on whether the two would tie the knot. Eventually, Graham proposed in 1993, and Winfrey said yes.

Oprah Winfrey and Stedman Graham attend the Vanity Fair Oscar Party at Wallis Annenberg Center for the Performing Arts in Beverly Hills, California on February 22, 2015. | Source: Getty Images

However, Winfrey had doubts afterward. She realized she didn't want a marriage; she just wanted Graham to pop the question so that she could know he felt she was worthy of being his wife. The producer also didn't want the sacrifices, compromises, and commitment that come with making a marriage work, as her work was her priority, and Graham also knew that.

Winfrey's partner teaches Identity Leadership across the world and has authored several books on the topic. The show host said their relationship works because Graham has created an identity other than "Oprah's man." The two also share essential values, with integrity topping the list. They also enjoy seeing each other fulfill their destiny and hope.

Graham is also in love with Winfrey. He said if she were to run for the presidency of the US, she'd be a great president as she is trustworthy, smart, has a photographic memory, is successful, and works very hard. The author added that their relationship works because he wants the best for her and is dedicated to her happiness.

Graham also reiterated Winfrey's words, noting that he has been able to find his own happiness, skills, abilities, and talents, which he is satisfied with. The two have built careers and lives outside of each other as much as they are deeply in love and in a committed relationship.

Winfrey and Graham share a love for food. The producer loves to cook and bake for Graham, who appreciates and relishes her meals. The author admitted, "First of all, she is a great cook, I mean among other things, she loves to be able to go out and cook whatever she wants to cook. She is kind of natural at it. It's a beautiful thing."

Recently, Winfrey said the most romantic thing she does for Graham is prepare "hot water cornbread" for him. This old-fashioned Southern dish consists of pan-fried cornmeal cakes. Most recipes use vegetable shortening, lard, and butter in the batter, but the show host only uses cornmeal, water, and oil to make hers.

Oprah Winfrey and Stedman Graham attend Tyler Perry Studios Grand Opening Gala - Arrivals at Tyler Perry Studios in Atlanta, Georgia on October 5, 2019. | Source: Getty Images

Every time Winfrey prepares hot water cornbread for Graham, he loves it, and it turns out to be the most romantic thing she has ever done. In turn, the most romantic thing Graham does for Winfrey is go to the corner every Sunday and bring her a copy of The New York Times. Winfrey also revealed that her partner loves eating octopus for breakfast, a passion she doesn't share.

Oprah Winfrey and Stedman Graham have shown how their love has endured without getting married. The pair keep the fire burning with their mutual respect, shared passions, common values, and deep love for each other. They have also expressed how having their own lives and career has tightened their bond.

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